Kitely Forums

Just to clarify, this isn't directed towards any one in particular.

The stated goals of the guidelines is to minimize drama and libel-liability (which can exist in various European countries) while keeping the forum open for free expression. You can express negative feelings about Kitely but attacking other people and grids can cross a line that may cause you or Kitely to be sued for libel by the offended party. That is not a danger that usually exists in the states, with its various free speech protections, but it is very real in European countries where libel suits can often be won without having to show actual damages.

This issue, like many others, was announced in the meeting agenda ahead of time and was brought to the forums after people started discussing it in the weekly Kitely Mentors Group meeting. Nothing was done behind anyones back and we're not excluding anyone from participating in the discussion. In fact, we're discussing it now

The problem isn't with negativity it's with outright attacking people in ways that can be considered defamation. People can completely disagree with things, be very outspoken about it and still remain civil in their conduct. The fact that we're all adults doesn't mean we need to argue like children. We can state everything that is bothering us and be VERY detailed about it without attacking people personally. If Kitely does something you don't like then please tell us about it in the forums and convince us to change our ways. However, the shortcomings of other grids and people can best be discussed in those grid's forums or in various other third-party sites. The Internet is not lacking for places to discuss whatever you want in whatever way you want. I think we should aim to keep the Kitely forums hospitable and related to Kitely.

Other than casual off-topic discussions, which are usually okay if they don't derail the thread, the place in the forums for non-Kitely related issues is the General Discussion section of the forums. Personally I have no problem with people discussing politics or religion there but I do have a problem if those conversations become the ground for personal attacks, insults, or slanderous language - those things can get both you and Kitely into trouble with third parties and should therefore be avoided. If you can't discuss these sensitive subjects in that section without it degenerating to mud throwing (which is, unfortunately, the expected outcome in most such discussions) then please find another website to discuss them and help keep Kitely a friendly and welcoming forum for civil discussion.

Marstol Nitely wrote:Do I really have to post snippets of each conversation for people to know what I'm referring to? It's not that long of a thread. Did I write that you act like a fictional character Sherrie? No. Then I didn't mean you.

My apologies Marstol. I wasn't implying that you did. Just stating my personal practice.

Wow, that escalated quickly.
There is no reason to attack my core beliefs. If it genuinely offended you, I apologise, it was far from the intent.

I have no interest in telling others what they can or can't do, or what they should and shouldn't, but I seriously didn't think wording the idea of being nice or not hostile to people in better worded quotes would cause offence.

Can't we all just get along ?

Thank you for clarifying Sherrie.

Marstol Nitely wrote:The problem isn't with negativity it's with outright attacking people in ways that can be considered defamation. People can completely disagree with things, be very outspoken about it and still remain civil in their conduct. The fact that we're all adults doesn't mean we need to argue like children. We can state everything that is bothering us and be VERY detailed about it without attacking people personally. If Kitely does something you don't like then please tell us about it in the forums and convince us to change our ways. However, the shortcomings of other grids and people can best be discussed in those grid's forums or in various other third-party sites. The Internet is not lacking for places to discuss whatever you want in whatever way you want. I think we should aim to keep the Kitely forums hospitable and related to Kitely.

Are you saying that I've done this Ilan? Because I feel as if I'm being scolded for something that I'm unaware of. I have not slandered anyone here or anywhere else and have no intention of doing so.

Marstol Nitely wrote: With the SLU stuff I did. I just didn't understand why you use them as an example of how things could/should be done. Maybe it's because I don't know what a PRS sub-forum is.

PRS = The Politics, Religion and Society sub-forum over on SLU. Even the description on the main SLU forums page warns about that sub-forum, "Not for the faint of heart." Trust me, they are not kidding about that. If you thought the Kitely sub-forum in the Other Grids/VWs section was hostile, that's a picnic compared to what happens in some of the PRS threads.

Sherrie was suggesting we have a warning on it similar to that if we ever started a Kitely forum section for those topics. Of course now that Ilan has made the official policy regarding these topics clear that whole concept now appears moot.

Marstol Nitely wrote:Are you saying that I've done this Ilan? Because I feel as if I'm being scolded for something that I'm unaware of. I have not slandered anyone here or anywhere else and have no intention of doing so.

I haven't Marstol. Please see this disclaimer at the top of my post:

Ilan Tochner wrote:Just to clarify, this isn't directed towards any one in particular.

Dundridge Dreadlow wrote:There is no reason to attack my core beliefs.

My intent was not to attack you. It was to disagree with you. I'm sorry, I didn't realize that those were your core beliefs. Let me state it another way. I do not believe that modeling everyone on the forums behavior after fictional characters is a good idea. I do not disagree that there are certain characteristics that these characters have that are admirable. If you wish to model you behavior after them that's perfectly fine with me.

Dundridge Dreadlow wrote:Be excellent to each other.

Oh, and just to clarify, I think this is an absolutely lovely sentiment.

Ilan Tochner wrote:I haven't Marstol. Please see this disclaimer at the top of my post:

I did see that Ilan. But you also used the thread that shall not be named as an example recently, and I felt a bit shamed. Even though I did not state anything false and actually said some nice things too. If you did not mean to use my part of that thread as an example, then I shouldn't feel shamed. Sorry if I misinterpreted.

I do wish I could attend meetings more frequently. It was my main area to socialize in Kitely. But my husband travels extensively and is generally home on Wednesdays now, and I choose to spend that time with him. Yesterday I just forgot because it's not a regular thing for me anymore, and I didn't see the meeting topics until long after the meeting was probably over. If it wasn't, I'm glad I wasn't there. Feel like I've done my share of marathon meetings.

Plus I see an appetite for control from some that I find unpalatable. I hate going to mentors meetings and arguing, but can't seem to keep my big fingers off the keyboard. So I go less often for that reason too.

If I seem like I'm emotional at times. It's because I am. I feel like I've invested a lot of time and energy into this grid. Not all my ideas or work has been successful, but I definitely put the effort in and I love this grid. I think it's the best thing in the metaverse and only getting better. So excuse me if I don't want to see everyone watered down and assimilated to someones subjective standards.

Frankly, I appreciate how this had gone so far.

Marstol,

That other thread, pls keep in mind it was dead until the folx from that other grid came in and added their dramas. They were obviously pointed to it, and nothing like this could ever be done on their own forums.

We gotta try and keep perspective here folx, and, since this is being said by a known Meta Nutcase, YOU SHOULD ALL LISTEN!!!